It’s that time again. Once more, we’re posting our open job listings at The Hundreds HOMEBASE right HERE. The next round of The Hundreds’ growth and progression is coming via web and content, so this time, the positions aren’t design and sales oriented as much as they are for content creation…

First, there are rules. If you’re one of those people that can’t follow the simplest of instructions, then you’re also probably the type to confusedly play the fire extinguisher like a saxophone while the rest of us are trapped in a raging office fire.

1) Only apply for the job if you can satisfy the listed requirements. It doesn’t matter if you’re 1 year shy of the requisite work experience, or you have an excuse, or your mom wrote a sweet letter of recommendation about you. Please don’t waste our time or yours. If you don’t fit the minimal requirements, then please do not e-mail us.

2) Title the e-mail with the job position you are applying for. Any e-mails that don’t follow this rule will be immediately deleted before we even get to the body. Unless it’s a really sexy body.

3) Cover letter. Resumé. And portfolio (if applicable). Mandatory. Mandatory. Mandatory.

4) To apply for a job, e-mail all of the above to careers@thehundreds.com.

5) You must be 18 or older to apply. The jobs are located in Los Angeles. Entitled, Internet-deluded, narcissistic applicants whose mommy and daddy told them that they were the best at everything and don’t know how to survive in a real workplace where they are critiqued and given orders and are faced with the hard truth that hey, maybe they are not that good and have a lot to learn NEED NOT APPLY but NEED A REALITY CHECK.

And these are the jobs we are currently hiring for at The Hundreds. First come, first serve.. .spread the word!:

Web Editor-in-Chief
– 5+ years experience as EIC or senior-level editorial position with a content-rich web magazine engaged in culture, fashion, and the arts.
– Must delegate and administer to a global staff of contributors on a consistent, 24/7 basis.
– Explores and procures stories from around the world.
– Proficient writing and editing skills.
– Not as distracted by WSHH fight videos as I am.

Social Media Coordinator
– Some experience preferable.
– Expert knowledge of all social media platforms The Hundreds interacts on: Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, Facebook, Weibo, Snapchat, Text messaging at 3am from a dark hotel room.
– Proficient writing and editing skills.
– Activates web content through social media channels.
– Please don’t be this.

Videographer / Documentarian / Editor
– 3+ years experience as a filmer and editor for a news-based agency, company, or publication.
– Proficient expertise of Final Cut Pro and Premiere.
– Must have no life.
– Seriously.

Staff Writer / Copywriter
– 3+ years experience as a professional writer
– Must know how to tell stories, have levity in style, sarcasm is a plus, anger is a gift.

There’s a lot more. But let’s start there for now.

Who’s coming with me?!