January 6, 2021

07 Jan 2021

Yesterday, during the insurrection, somebody left a comment on my IG along the lines of, “How come you’re not saying anything about what’s happening?”

For one, Instagram, while an ideal venue to shop and market product, is not the most efficient platform to host political debates or share information (I’d prefer to use Twitter or my Blog for that). But two, I just didn’t have anything to say. I was speechless. I was crippled with anxiety, horror, and sadness, as we watched our President incite treasonists to storm our nation’s capitol.

Yesterday was akin to 9/11, witnessing terrorists defile our democracy, uncorking a seal that will never quite be restored. That, of the sanctity of our republic and our precious institutions. Of the countless, chilling images, the one that broke my heart was of the man shamelessly brandishing the confederate flag down the halls. If you’ve ever been robbed or burglarized, if you’ve ever been physically violated, you know the feeling. Except this time, the assault was happening to your country. It was like watching thieves roam in your house from a home security camera. I will never forget that helplessness.

Some responses are best served immediately and scorching with emotion. Fuck everyone, I felt in the moment. Fuck Josh Hawley and Ted Cruz. All my homies hate Hawley and Cruz. Fuck Pence and Mitch for speaking up at the twelfth hour. Fuck the cops who didn’t try hard enough, fuck the terrorists who killed the cop. Fuck the racism. Fuck the system. Fear steeped in anger, the hate churned and churned…

However, the most useful responses are those that are seasoned with time and reflection. My thoughts will mature and evolve as the weeks, months, and years go by, and I will share with you what I learn along the way. But, just one day later, what I can say is this:

There is a time and place for reaching across the aisle and establishing common ground. Yesterday, in DC, was not that time or place. I believe in political discourse and shared communication. But, when it comes to Hate, conspiracy cults, and dismantling the Democratic process, there is no room for compromise in the United States of America. The middle would still fall somewhere amidst enemy territory.

I don’t know where America goes from here, but I care for her more than ever. Perhaps we needed to be reminded how fragile it all was. In the meantime, there is a wild and corrosive trauma that’s been unleashed upon us. So, there’s no rush to diagnose, or solve, or even to speak on the matter. There is only listening and surviving and adapting.

Love.

—X—