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CRABBY

CRABBY

By Bobby Hundreds

Yeah I know.. more food? Mmhmmm, I actually just flew 14 hours halfway around the world to eat dinner. That’s all I do. Eat dinner at these crazy restaurants and then go eat some more dinner. And then just when it starts getting old, I do a couple situps, check email, and then eat more dinner.

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And what is it with these Hong Kong restaurants and their terrible names? Kevin (Hypebeast) and Jason (FAM) set up a 7-course crab meal at SUPERSTAR (?!??) tonight. Quite the educational experience, especially considering it took us just over 3 hours to work our way through the ordeal.

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The dinner kicked off with these amazing crab dumplings that were filled with soup inside. I had no idea what they were called, but I thought “The saggy bottom things” sounded about right. Regardless, delicious.

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The waiter then asked if we wanted something to drink, offering us a wide array of beverage choices: Alcohol or fresh orange juice. That’s it. No water, nothin’. I just mixed the two together and got Daffy Duck Orange Drink.

SUPERSTAR’s trademark dish are these fresh crabs that you’re supposed to tear into for minimal meat reward.

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Plus, there’s a method to the mayhem, a strict guideline on how to break open Sebastian. I’ll run through the list: Flip him over, shove industrial scissors up his junk, clip his cheeks, pop the hood, ditch anything that is white, clear the gills, chop the claws, slice the entire sucker in half, dig out the insides with a dental instrument, suck the legs out, rinse in soy sauce, eat, and repeat.

By the end of the process, you’re left with this. I guess it’s more about the journey then the destination.

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Some fish and chicken. Simple. This time, the cooks did us a favor and exorcised the insides for us.

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Jason and Kevin dig right in.

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Jason also brought us some new tees from FAM,.. this one’s the collab with MC Yan’s record label. Check out the packaging. Great, even more stuff I gotta rip apart to enjoy.

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The dessert consisted of a bowl of bird vomit. That is not a joke, and it’s certainly not funny. I guess it’s considered a delicacy in Hell. I don’t think I can order this as my 3rd item in my Panda Express lunch tray.

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Benjie re-evaluates his life decisions that brought him to this point of eating bird vomit. As a dessert.

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Now I’m off to eat dinner.

by bobbyhundreds

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