Monthly Archives: September 2012

I ran into John Jay at a Starbucks on Varick Street. Yes, THAT Starbucks. He told me I needed to drop everything and get to the Suzanne Geiss gallery to see the consummate collection of fashion illustrations by Antonio Lopez.

Before photoshop, scanners… maybe not tracing paper… this is generally how ideas were presented. Or how Vogue and the New York Times would have the ability to feature future seasons without samples. Get over it.

This is definitely the tiger face from a Ring Ling Bros. circus poster. I know because it hung in my room and gave me nightmares until Stephen Kings IT took it’s place.

Corded Karl.

Larry C of Rochambeau and Proof 7 says “NO” to more reality shows than you watch.

I spent last weekend in my second favorite Santa. Santa Ana. Why? ‘Cuz the Stafford Brothers had a gig at Yost theater. Who? The Jonas Brothers of DJing, The Stafford brothers. It’s ok, you will be obsessed with them next year. This is the worst looking one Chris Stafford.

Who says Brooke Evers will never be featured on The Hundreds?

Brooke is Tamie’s friend. So at my count that makes 2. 2 friends.

Shit escalated quickly.

I helped by using my new laser beam app. It’s only available on the Samsung Galaxy S III.

Steve Aoki has the birthday cake. DJ Tanner Throws up, Stafford throw inflatable kangaroos.

Wicked awesome to hang with Kaylani Lei in our own private back stage VIP table. Oh hey L.A. Riots.

Is Australia getting huge… or is it just me?

JD is the world’s worst cocaine salesperson.

One of these things is not like the other. (HINT: It’s the giant tranny on the left.)

Matt may have stolen my hat… but I stole his heart. Pause.

Oh snap Parker was there there whole time. He is from London, only writes #1 hits, and is as quiet as a door mouse.

Some clubs in NYC are really hard to get into unless you know the promoter, the owner, buy a table, or are with Josh Hartnett. Fortunately for me I had all 4. I never knew “Oak” stood for “One Of A Kind?!”

View from the table.

It also helps if you roll with a bunch of models. (I didn’t say what kind of models!)

Josh is so hospitable and caring. He offered free hugs and roofie-less drinks to everyone. I’m totally renting Lucky Number Slevin tonight.

1 Oak is boring let’s go to Southside. This guy owns the place.

Flynnie is the only Australian you need to know downtown. Uptown is a different story.

Oh hey US Open winning Julian Wilson, thanks for hanging out.

Relax, it’s just searing painful candle wax.

One of these girls goes to MIT, one has an expired green card, one thinks her purse was “stolen” and one has no idea I put her address on craigslist.

Matt McDonald and Alex Douglas will be surprised to see their picture here.

Former W+K ex-pats Wei Wei, Matthew Carey and Lil’ Mike Warzin in full effect. Half effect is even less ordinary.

Hey Taylor, Tom Sachs called.  He loves your new commercial.

I like to put my snap back over my eyebrows. That way you can’t see how scared I am.

Flynnie’s brother Lil’ Flynnie was there.

Chi, I can’t get you Paranormas, I tried. There is a room full of Coralines hidden away in a W+K closet, I’m still working on it.

Since 1977 the greatest collection of leather and skins is available at Libra Leather. The founder and owner Mitch Alfus is the scrumtrulescent wizard of leather. From A. Wang to Chrome Hearts, if you can’t find it here… it doesn’t exist.

Tamie and Jasmine have started their own woman’s footwear line called Mara&Mine. They let me tag along while they purchase some skins for next season.

Jasmine taking the whole “call me maybe” thing literally.

SPOILER ALERT!: Perforated short hair poney leather will be everywhere next year.

The only person that can say, “I bees in the trap” and not sound like a complete moron… is a fur trader.

I asked what the most exotic skin here was and our guide pulled out this ugly brown one. When he told me it was Hippo I instantly wanted it. $65 per square foot, bullet and meteor resistant. They don’t kill hippos they wait for them to die naturally. How rad would hippo interior be in your Prius?

It looks like fabric, but it’s leather. And you will be wearing it next summer. Especially the tie dye.

It’s like Uniqlo… only instead of cotton and nylon you have to slaughter thousands of baby cows and rub coco butter lotion on them.

There are cool secrets around every corner, and a showroom I wasn’t allowed to photograph.

Gator belts were on sale. Rap lyric caption too easy.

If any thing is worth making, it’s worth making out of leather.

This laser cut pattern was made for Chrome Hearts, but they didn’t like the color. So now you can own it and pretend you designed it. Maybe the visor of a snap back? Get over yourself.

Last night was Fashion Night Out in New York City. I was trying to pick out a new Goyard bag at Bergdorf Goodman when fashion week officially started.

Wendy and Yu-Ming were there.

Then I was in the center of the earth.

Python skin Chanel short set and 7 secruity guards. At least I got a smile.

The devil rolls deep!

After a pic of Anna Wintour you really don’t need anything else. Let’s go get wasted.

Pietro owns a hot new restaurant and a few french twinks he is interested in selling.

Everyone went to the Futura show.

Not everyone went to the after party.

Corbin and Pat were there.

Do your homework.

No pics inside the after after party.

But Bernardo was up in there!

Are you familiar with Uber? It’s all done through your phone. You can see how close cars are. It’s only like $24, you hit one button and a private driver shows up where you are within minutes. It’s Dion favorite way to travel. While in the Hamptons Team Inner Circle Uber’d everywhere. Let’s Go!

Using GPS the driver locates you and calls you when he arrives.  I say “he” because I’ve yet to see a female driver.

You can select car or SUV. It’s usually a towncar or a Tahoe, but sometimes I’ve gotten an Escalade.

Most drivers have the auxiliary cable so you can put your own music on. This is what people that just learned the Two Chains dance look like.

Two chains.

You take Uber to see your favorite Winklevoss twin. My favorite is Cameron.

You can drink as much as you want, cuz your’re not driving.

At some point you will want to leave, or the bar runs out of rosé.

If you need to vomit, you should be courteous to other passengers and your driver and bring your own cup.

At least you got some of it in the cup.

Mac doesn’t look so good either. Was it something he ate?

Try Uber cab. Arrive in style, debauch in privacy.

Jasmine and Nick Mathers rode the same plane to party for a week in NYC. 

Dion G was not one to miss a weekend in the Hamptons. He brought money and 52 bottles of rosé. Blue dress being worn by a person named Ava.

I’m not even conceited enough to post 20 photos in a row of my hair, but this one deserved honerable mention.

Tonic water gets everything out. Not shown: Dion pulled the fire alarm in a pretentious restaurant.

Ava got a tattoo and was very willing to show it off.

$800 to get into the worst club of all time. Dream? More like anal nightmare.

Never bring sand to the beach.

This is the house we rented. This Croatian’s name is Stoy.

God bless America.

Mac’s favorite baseball player is Sandy Kofax. (he loves Jews)

Mac can bench press more (models) than you.

In East Hampton… Mac is the 1 percent!