Monthly Archives: May 2012

Welcome to Miami, I mean Fort Lauderdale, pause.  After an incredible week, and even more outrageous week at Amusement Park (which is doing ridiculously well, thank you for asking.) Dion Giannarelli invited T.I.C. “team inner circle” (team name still subject to change) to his new home for some semi professional tanning and trust fund spending.

Those of you not familiar with the Giannarelli family here are a few Bullet points. The Giannarelli’s are one of Australia’s most powerful families. They used to bury 5,000 people a year… legally! Sure there is some sensationalism. Lil a this, lil a that….

I showed up a little later than everyone.

Dion? What’s in the case? “One thing about us Giannarellis… we are always prepared.”

Dion Giannarelli invited us out on his Uncle Gary’s boat. A 74′ Sunseeker. It’s only 6 years old, originally cost $2.4 million but Gary got a deal. How you doin?

By now you are probably asking yourself, “who the fuck is Dion Giannarelli?” Well perhaps this video will help.  Password: freshwater

This is the exact moment I told Tamie my secret. She was totally cool with it.

You don’t need a boat to show the world how awesome you are, when you got one of these!

I know what you are thinking… those are the glasses from the Justin Bieber video.

When you have a massive yacht helicopters take pics of you, then you go to boatpix.com to purchase pix of yourself. As soon as I see them of myself, so will you.

Ben Hundreds lunch delivery device.

Let’s launch off it.

Anyone can have a boat… or hire a singer… But no one can have Dion singing, exclaiming, and harassing everyone within ears reach. “What are the poor people doing today? They are right there on that little boat.”

Not sure if he is a time traveler from the past… or was born in the wrong generation, Dion literally thinks he is Dean Martin or Frank Sinatra.

Completely sober, he sang for 8 hours. He also brought his own speaker system.

“Look at you, you don’t have to wait for the bridge to open do you”

This is a great shot, it only took 5 bottles.

Tats crew. get it?

Jasmine has a drinking problem. Also Kevin, we got plenty of box water.

Tiger Woods’ house… for now at least.

“I love you, and you know what… you love me too!”

You’re on my radar. Luv ya guts.

You thought he would stop once off the boat… he didn’t. He just got more wasted and inappropriate.

You thought the guy that brought his own Kareoke system didn’t bring his own fireworks? You have never been more wrong in your life.

All this thuggery is making me hungry, let’s go get some crab legs… pause.

You’ve heard of hover hand… here is the first captured hover face.

It’s a Gwen Stefani song… but it actually happened.

I was invited to Miami because I won the DNA lottery. What no one seemed to look into, or possible they did and thought it would be funny, was this weekend was “Urban Week” otherwise known as “white out”. Where all the whites leave Miami.  Not sure why they did… I had a BLAST.

Old and busted: Spinning Rims. New Hotness: No Spin Rims! Popularly known as “floaters“. It looks like the wheels don’t move.  What is going? Is this real life? What the fuck does “meta” mean? Before World Peace? After world peace?

We found this girl.

Then we found her car!

I havn’t had lunch at the Delano is at least 11 months.

Hey Deutsch, here is your best idea for Volkswagen. It’s ok if you steal it from me… wouldn’t be the first time!

No spin rims made going to Miami worth it.

The Stafford Brothers have a sick house in the hills.  They are Australia’s biggest DJ’s. They are so big they are over OZ and have brought their entourage to L.A. to get even bigger.  I stepped in some Skrillex on the driveway.

Aimee Fischer-Gray or A.F. Cray!

The party doesn’t start till Ira Jones walks in.

I wish girls wouldn’t laugh whenever I got naked.

From Portland to L.A., Gabe, Ira, and Xtina.

Hey sports fans.

When you see it… 

Brooke Evers was there.

Powerful pic. Almost #SODO.

Chris Stafford

Matt Stafford

I really hope they don’t ask me to help clean up…

Using the bottle as a phone… I’m totally stealing that idea.

Power overload

Stephanie Solomon

Ever wonder how The Cobra Snake commutes to work? Me neither but he has been getting into Chip N Dale shape lately. You go mark!

Natalie Montgomery really likes antlers.

Been running up a massive bill at the Everliegh lately.

Mikeshot your boy DJ Quik was here. HYPERIZER.

DJ Source & Armando Rodriguez

That’s Shae, everyday.

The Thuggish Ruggish Bone.

Is that Teek the Sneak?

Peter thought the Fugees would be the surprise guest, but it was Bone Thugs instead. Rock the Bells line up isn’t as hyped as the Coachella lineup… but wait till you see hologram ODB.

This weekend Rob Dyrdek and his friends took over a house in the hills to help launch his new venture IVI Vision. Partnering with Pete Fox (legend) and Designer Jerome Mage to create this new premium action sports brand.

Here is the collection.

Here is the collection on Daddy.

Here is the new Windows Nokia Lumia 900 smartphone. If you ask Siri what the best smartphone on the market is… she will tell you this one.

Ryan Sheckler was here while Ben Baller was searching for him to deliver his new watch.

And now you have to add “acrylic see through walkway” to your ultimate Barbie dream house.

Sean B

Scottie Perkins is an action sports eyewear enthusiest.

Everyone’s favorite blonde, The Dingo!

Confirming the current trend of white Doc Martens…Muska Beatz.

This photo isn’t blurry, HUF is actually glowing.

After missing her chance with Sheckler, Jasmine started binge eating.

Melissa from Microsoft stunned after motor boating the world’s greatest wingman, Nick Ingate.

Having or showing an excessively high opinion of one’s appearance, abilities, or worth. 

Mike and Elena love a good party.. and an even better lawsuit.

Ryan Jefferson was feeling like a million bucks.

Authentic New Zealander is actual size.

Serious gift bag. Thank you Janae Twisselman for the dopest party of the year… so far!

Yesternight was the Barry McGee opening at the Prism gallery. It will remain up till like June 30th if you forgot to get a mothers day gift.

Ray Fong’s mature advanced work has come a long way from the Twist screws I first discovered in Back Bay.

Anne Marie Sanguinetti moved back to L.A., the dial was on the wrong setting, things arn’t always black and white.

I get to introduce to America the Stafford Brothers! Haha! No one I know has ever blogged them!! In your face internet! If you ever want to get into the Marquee club in Vegas just tell them you are with me, it will work, for real.

Her Majesty, Diane von Furstenberg, formerly Diane, Princess of Fürstenberg came to support a homey.

That’s a little extreme.

Buff Monster and Sharktoof had an early night…

… me and Pat had a late night.

Complex recently asked me what my top 25 print ads were… It is a very hard question, especially when the only rule was “no nipples“. Here are the ads Complex can’t feature.  Can’t lives on won’t street I tells them.

The number 2 spot was filled by FUCT.  For whatever reason it was not included. FUCT ads and clothing was a major part of my upbringing. I also included it because I was afraid of what Erik Brunetti would do if I didn’t!

When TBWA/CHIAT/DAY launched Playstation 2 in Europe, they essentially blew everyone’s tits off.

If you saw these in Harlem during the summer of 2008 and didn’t get offended then you are normal.  The homosexual community complained until this Nike campaign was removed.

In surfing a “quiver” usually defines ones collection of goodies that make up oneself. Surfing magazine ads in the 90′s were great for this style.  I couldn’t find any so I just found this dude Scottie posing in Venice. His Essentials are in the streets.

Some bank in England was all like, “gain pounds”.

The only thing funnier than a dead fireman is a dead baby.  This ad takes care of both. I wrote this while texting and driving.

This one was just excluded. It’s really old but look how as he drinks it colors himself in, then he goes back for another glass. Those Frenchman never know when to quit.

This weekend was a chain link arrangement of parties that started off with the Sole Bicycles party in Venice. Sole is celebrating their 1 year anniversary of their ability to drink beer and be young attractive business owners. If I read the website or cared even one Magic Johnson white blood cell about fixies I could tell you what Sole means or stands for.

Who would play me in my movie?  Steve O? Skeet Ulrich? Hillary Swank?

I was under the impression this was going to be a good party. I was more wrong than the last pizzas delivered to the World Trade Center

If you hold up a miniature fixie over the bridge of your nose you will look like John Lennon.

You heard of two chains… have you heard of TWO SHIIRRRRRTTTSS, Luke Adams.

Looking for a hat that I USED TO OWN! (I made you read it in the Gotye voice)

Uh oh… someone learned how to take obscure ambiguous party shots!

Excuse me, oh never mind, I thought it was a Cartier Love bracelet… its just a broken condom worn as a bracelet.

The only thing I hate more than fixies is tattoos… and fireman… and tarot card readers… and chiropractors, and posers.

Hey Tara are you a stylist? Or do you always dress like that?

Jayanta Jenkins says you never wanna come off as puerile. Marcelino Agabon was here for a Diplo concert… that he created.

Here is your weekly tumblr sacrifice. Double click; save image as.

Italian motorsports high performance protective gear manufacture Alpinestars has an office in Torrence and Chris Hull left the door unlocked.

Alpinestars started in Italy and blew up internationally with their moto-cross boots in the 70′s and 80′s. My un-asked for opinion is their “A-star” logo is one of the strongest of all time. It’s a letter “A” and a “STAR”, eat that Microsoft… haha your logo is shitty and herbish.

After dominating dirtbikes AS took on all forms of engine fueled racing. These are the boots for the knee-draggers. She how I used one of their industry slang words to make it appear I’m one of them, so I can win their trust and steal their girlfriends.

For the past 4 decades the soles were hand sewn, just as they had been 400 years before the invention of dirtbikes.

No more seams! The new Tech 10 (sorry, they skipped Tech 9) sole is molded composite. Stronger, lighter, comfortable yet durable, has the faint aroma of aftershave.

Hello ladies from Manhattan Beach, you might not recognize these jackets hanging up, just imagine them on your floor, next to your waterbed.

Why would a Formula 1 champion print their sponsors on nomex? Because if it saves 2 grams more than the custom embroidery the team is very happy with you.

Road Rash.

Alpinestars is involved in more than just technical race wear. Here we have an artists expression you may remember from Joe Hahn’s store SURU.

100′s of hours of development went into creating a fireproof racing suite for Danica Patrick that can be undone with a single velcro strap!

Woody from Sneaker Freaker should be pleased to see his design on display.

Not for the squinters. Offish, amaze, awks, ridic, vag, deffo!

I liked this one piece racing shoe.

Old and tired: Matching your sneakers to your hat…

New Hottness: Matching your sneakers to your vehicle(s)!

Don’t call Homeland Security, it’s not what you think.

How many times have you been Miguel Duhamel‘ing at 180+ and you become motorcycle disabled and you crash into the haybales, or tires, or race fans. You would probably think, man I wish I had an airbag system..

You are in luck! Alpinestars has invented an in leather airbag system.  Using a very fancy algorithm it knows the difference between a huge wobble, and a full on yardsale. It’s the same algorithm my ex-wife used to contradict me and remain angry!

This is the Tech Air race suite.  It has fucking air bags in it.

The electronics are kept in the hump. Also just like my ex-wife.

Oh, and if the air bag deploys once and you are able to get back on the bike and continue racing, there is another compressed nitrogen canister for secondary deployment. However if you crash twice you probably have other issues you need to address.

Chris reminded my I was not one of the people the sign was talking about.

The only other thing to do in Torrence is throw rocks at the 5th floor window of Saatchi & Saatchi until John Kritch and Gary Rosen come out.