Monthly Archives: November 2011

One of Los Angels’ best kept secrets is Jack Rossi. Think about when you were a kid and you told your best friend that whoever got rich would let the other one live in their mansion as well.  Or, when you saw the movie BIG, you thought, “That’s exactly how I plan on living as soon as someone murders my evil parents….”. It is totally acceptable to think only Bobby Hundreds and Johnny Cupcakes live this way. Jack proves you don’t have to be a multimillionaire with Peter Pan Syndrome to never grow up, he just does adulthood better than the rest.

Jack speaks about the Castlevania arcade cabinet he got from someone in Florida, like a proud parent. Also many a case of Blue Moon had been drunken spending hours on Zaxxon.

Jack’s desk is just like any other toy designer with a fierce background in graffiti and pop culture. If you can find Waldo you can continue reading.

Jack explains this is just what he has acquired since moving to L.A. 8 years ago. “You should see my desk back home!” Jack then pulled out a glow in the dark Velcro wallet and showed me a picture of his desk back home.

Oh this Tom Servo? I made this years ago, and got it signed by the cast.

Jack loves Ghostbusters more than I love yelling “PREDATOR DRONE” in the shower at L.A. Fitness. Why don’t more girls dress up as Gozer for Halloween? Bustin’ makes him feel good!

Jack’s next project is to recreate a working, jumping, dancing Toastmaster. He will do it to.  How do I know? Keep scrolling, prepare for champion style awesomeness.

Something old, something new, something borrowed, something sealed in it’s original packaging for eternity.

Today everyone is an expert on the BTTF Air Mag sneakers. Let’s pretend it was two years ago… Like when I had bad hair and was poor. Jack wanted to create the best Marty McFly costume the world had ever known. So he did what any normal BTTF fan would do.  Jack found a manufacturer in China that would build anything for $2,000. Finding 10 friends as die hard as he was to kick in $200 was easy. 6 weeks later Jack had one of 10 very realistic neoprene sky tops. How did this not make it on hypebeast? Hmmmmm.

For real, the only ones that existed before these were the actual movie props, or puppets. Jack was the first to reproduce (bootleg) The Nike Air Mag. Well done sir.

Ask someone that makes shoes if they even make soles as original as this. What do you mean it’s too expensive? You only use vulcanized? If Jack can do it…

They don’t autolace, or light up… but for $200 Jack should be giving TED talks.

Yes the original turtles are wearing baby Nike’s. What else would they be wearing?

Crow T. Robot… Jack made this when he was a baby.

If I learned one thing today. When someone asks “I’ll bet you everything in your pockets I have the banned Tenacious D album cover.” Never take that bet. Many copies of the worlds greatest album do not have the naked babies or the pentagram.

If you are familiar with common stencil and wheat pastes spots around L.A. then you are most likely familiar with J-Stone. I don’t have to spell it out. Here is the stencil, and Jack knows where it’s kept.

The never released complete set of Big Trouble in Little China figures.

Ghostbuster Goggles? Jack made a pair… cept his are 3D.

Also a Big Trouble in Little China relic… The Dragon Gang glasses… Jack didn’t make these, he bought them here.

When I was working with Jack at the PITCH agency, strange objects started arriving in the mail. Asking him what the fuck he was doing opened me up to his world. He was building ANOTHER proton pack. Want to see the FIRST ONE HE MADE? Also, how it was featured in Nintendo Power Magazine?

This one lights up and has all the sounds a real one from the movie… wait… this is a real one from the movie.

MADBALLS!

It’s a trap! Jack tells me Mattel released these one day, super limited, they all sold out instantly and rarely come on eBay. Fully automated, I should have taken a video… Jack loves everything to do with everything… so he made a case for the iPhone trap app. Jack just does what he wants.

Jack Rossi is also a semi pro Frisbee golfer. Every Sunday you can find him wherever that weird metal thing with chains is stuck in the ground,  surrounded by barefoot hippies

This is not the last you will be hearing about Jack… I wrote knowingly….

Thanksgiving eve is usually held for everyone you went to highschool with to pretend like none of them weren’t looking forward to meeting up at Slatterys‘, all year long . Not this year tuff tits. Last night The Hundreds x Diamond celebrated their “Forever Summer“ collaboration with the second event. Taking over Drai’s Hollywood nightclub on top of the W hotel in Hollywood. The most un-basic of all the rooftop clubs… in Hollywood. Here is Bobby haunting me in my club dreams.

There is Kreayshawn being carried on an elevate while she is rockin’ in the club.

If she has a chopper on her… she hides it well…

She started with “Bumpin’, Bumpin’

One big room.

This one is funny cuz only Natalia is in focus!

After every performance Natalia likes to tell a secret into Kreayshawn’s hair.

Is this why they say “MEOW” at the end of the Gucci Gucci song? Am I the last person at the Aston Martin dealership to figure this out?

Is this a bad bitch? Or a basic bitch? We might never know.

Why you looking bitter, I be looking better!

Which means?!

The Samsung building is more useful than a blue beacon to find my way home and better hookups than crooked casting agents.

There is a small office you can pay $50 to make all your fat cells just go away. Vitamin B12 liquifies fat. That’s all I know. It’s healthy and it’s a vitamin.

So I let this lady pump 8 cc’s of whatever is in that… in my ass.  Pause.

Then with a cocktail of vitamins, minerals, and appetite suppressants.

I’m in for a foodless week and about 10 pounds lighter than I starter with.  Wait.  What are 7 words Ben Hundreds will never say? “I’m 10 pounds lighter than I….” you get it…

If it’s good enough for Ronald Reagan and Freddy Prince Jr. It’s good enough for me!

BDP was down here shooting the latest Kevin Durant spot… and spitting fire all the way.

I used to use a blog as a platform to show off everything brands would send me. That all changed after one sideways remark from Joe La Puma on the Complex blog back in 2007. He was like, “we never post swag people send us… we leave that to Rob Heppler’s Hypebeast blog.” And he was right to say it. My blog looked like Sarah Morrison’s house… mostly shit you can’t give away at a yard sale in Lowell. Since then, I try to just feature something original in my own words. Except… today… the parcel service shined down on me and made my office look like a recycling center, or Carlos‘ house.

My Vice President friend Russ Rowan alerted me last week that he needed a real address for me.  Not the one I give to the Department of Child Support. Russ has created a new influencer program over at SPYDER. You know, the essential winter action sports gear which has been worn by Olympians for over 30 years. The company with a logo so bad-ass they have to mail the Hells Angles copyright infringement letters.

The “Limitless” program is an insider only, creative outreach, celebrity gifting, dopeness rewarding, who’s who of awesomeness that sends sensationally rad gifts to selected individuals. Today’s item is a anodized aluminum wrist band containing an iPod Nano.

Did you know the iPod has a radio now? I didn’t because all my music is given to me… by my downstairs neighbor Manito, who only owns one Sean Paul CD that plays “gimme da light” non stop. But for real tho, there is a radio on the iPod.

Thank you Spyder and Russ for the LOVE! Also if any celebrities are reading this Spyder would like to send you one… just ask!

The mail man didn’t stop there. If you like nice things… wait fuck that. I hate when people say, “I like nice things”, no shit… no one ever says, “I like to purchase inferior products to support bad design and keep landfills in business.” Yves Saint Laurent only bought awesome shit. They made museums look foolish. Yves and his live in best friend bought whatever the wanted, like the honey badgers of art and Renaissance era jewelry. When Yves had enough of this perfect world he simply stopped his giant heart from beating and said, “auction all this shit off at Sotheby’s, and make a book out of that mess.” That’s what this book is. Hundreds of millions of dollars of dope shit, that two dudes collected to throw parties and brag to their almost as cool as them, friends.

Speaking of books of expensive shit, perhaps you are familiar with this one. The making of the Damien Hirst diamond skull. It’s pretty cool, if you are into perfect, huge, conflict free diamonds being set into a platinum copy of a young adults skull. The real human teeth show he went through stress between the ages of 3-5.

The letter said: To Rob, When you are finished with your skull we would like to cover it in jimmies… like your friend Jim Riswold.  Signed- Damien Hirst.

Hidden deep in Coldwater Canyon is one of Hollywood’s hardest working secrets. BarnYard FX is the lifes work of special effects overlord Greg Aronowitz. Greg’s magic is all we need to bring what could be our biggest idea to life. This blog post is rated PB-4, because with 23 pictures you will need to pee before you read it!

Undercover stainless steel gullwinger. I wonder if a stainless steel car ever gets dirty?

There she is… your Komodo Dragon…

Hands off my lean life size purple Arnold. (Runner up caption: “Chill out on that yurple drank Mr. Freeze!”)

CHARK!

Imagine everything you did for the past 18 years was fucking awesome.  Then you would have a barn like Greg.  Did I mention he has worked on over 200 films and has the world record for keeping Steven Spielberg on hold (18 minutes 44 seconds).

That’s Greg with a life size creation he made to pitch a TV show.

Inside the house the spectacle carries on.  Everything you see was made here.  Toys, masks, props, Jerome‘s fly ass waves.

“Boola Boola Heppler” Translation: “I look forwards to hearing of Hepplers’ death.”

Oh, you didn’t know Jabba the Hipster had a tattoo? It is pretty common knowledge to true Star Wars fans that Jabba’s right arm bore a tattoo of his kajidic clan, the Desilijic. Big Gizz also bore an identical tattoo, in respect of the Hutt’s “generous” employment.

The briefcase of souls.

I think one of you T-Shirt companies should re-appropriate this instantly recognizable logo.

It’s like Greg’s genetic make up is programmed to release endorphins if he just keeps making cool shit.

Poor Red Ranger…

A desk of a champion.

I feel, if you don’t have one of these… you are not allowed to wear a denim shirt, jacket, bucket hat or boots of any sort.

Just when you think this place couldn’t get any radder… a naked devil woman stratocaster.

Did you design the Aeon Flux statue? Greg: “Yes.”

PUPPET MASTER! PINHEAD! THE FUN NEVER STOPS! ENDLESS NIGHTMARE FERTILIZER!

IT’S A TRAP!

OOHHHHH That’s how you clean it!

This is most of the Amusement Park Entertainment team. A brand new not ad agency, that does advertising, apps, TV, film, events, and anything awesome. This is the creative team lead by the fucking legendary Jimmy Smith. Cash Warren and Abdul stopped by to talk about the future and how we can work together. They also brought Baron Davis along with them… where did he run off to…?

There he is! You play to much Baron Davis! Baron was explaining how he is such an incredible rapper, so he escaped to Pablo Dylan’s recording studio (which is custom built into our office)… more on Pablo later.

Check out young Rome acting like he’s not texting, “MOM! B Dizzel is standing next to me! He smells like a Nana’s wheelchair pillow!”

Now that I got this new job, I can move out of my trailer.

Roberto wasn’t allowed to wear sneakers in the castle he grew up in, so he went a little crazy on Jordan’s last weekend.